Blog #5
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Doctors That Fuck Up Important Operations
By Captain Garbarrassing | March 19, 2008
Hello Friends,
I'm pretty hung over today. So I was having a pretty fucking terrible morning, until I decided to check out today's news.
As you know, there's always murder, corruption, and generally depressing things being reported on top news sites like CNN, MSNBC,
Google News, and so on. So I decided to check in with our mildly retarded friends at Fox News (see rants for more on this subject).
As usual, this turned out to be a fantastic idea. See, Fox happens to be our main source for finding Garbarrassing News Stories. Let me give you the title of the greatness I stumbled upon today: "Woman goes for leg operation, gets new anus instead".
The story was pretty shocking, kinda baffling, and all-around absolutely completely fucking hilarious. Now, there are two things that came to my
mind when reading this story. The first is obvious: How the fuck can a surgeon, who was smart enough to graduate from medical school, make such a stupid mistake?? How can a person who is qualified by a legal institution to operate on a living human
being...fuck up this badly?? Well, it is very clear that these doctors have no common sense.
Most people who are very "book-smart," like doctors, have very little common sense. I know this is not true for everyone, so...if
you are a doctor reading this, and you have never accidentaly given someone a NEW ANUS, please try not to get offended. Because the odds are that you're still severely lacking in common sense. Anyway, the point is...these ignorant
motherfuckers look at this woman, see her normal looking anus and her twisted/broken leg, and still fail to ask the question:
"Are you sure you don't want leg surgery???" AND what about that patient. That lovely, wonderful, happy patient. She's expecting a nice brand new, working leg! HMMMMMMMMMMM. TOO BAD. Imagine you wake up from your operation and your
ass is sore. Well this is an unfortunate situation. You have no idea why. Because you know that you were supposed to have only a leg operation.
Garbarrassing.com sends our best wishes
to this victim. We hope you're enjoying your brand new anus, and hopefully you will one day find the right person to fix your leg - if you can ever trust anyone, ever again. On another note, what happened to the person at the other end of this mixup? Some poor bastard was waiting patiently for the Anus-donor list to find him a match, and when they finally did he gets blindsided! BOOM, you still can't shit, and now you have a prosthetic right leg! Kill yourself! That's all for now. Later.
-Captain G
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